Parenting after separation and the grief that gets in the way

When a relationship ends, even if you are the one who decided to end it, it can take a long time to grieve, let go and move on. What often helps, as much as anything, is to put as much distance as possible between you and your ex. But if you have kids together, this is easier said than done, and the children need the two of you to be able to communicate about them and their needs. When separated couples come to Family Dispute Resolution to sort out parenting agreements, often old wounds reawaken. If you're not careful, intense feelings that come from grief - such as anger, hurt and sadness - can overwhelm and completely overtake the process, and it can become impossible to distinguish what you need to feel OK emotionally with what the kids need. It's so important to get support to work through those feelings - not only for your own sake, so you can move forward and have the rich, satisfying life you deserve - but for your kids to enjoy the best that both of their parents have to offer.

As always, your comments, reflections and stories about your experience are most welcome.

Till next time, Vivienne.

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