Rebuilding trust: where "trust issues" meet "untrustworthiness" in intimate relationships

Trust is integral to intimate relationships - it's not only the foundation on which everything else is built, it is also the glue that holds the relationship together. For many of us, trust is not easily given to another person where we have been let down in the past.

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Why pre-marriage counselling may be the best investment you ever make

It may not seem like the obvious thing to think about - you're in love, everything's wonderful, you or your loved one have popped the question and are sitting in the happy afterglow. If you've only been together a short time, you may still be in the 'honeymoon phase' where everything seems perfect!

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Is unresolved trauma affecting the way you see your partner?

Many of us have experienced interpersonal trauma during our growing up years. Interpersonal trauma is different from other kinds of trauma in some important ways. Traumatic events such as having a car accident or surviving a natural disaster like the bushfires, for example, do not necessarily affect our interpersonal relationships in a negative way, although of course there may be other severe and long-reaching effects from which we need to heal.

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'Emotional brains' versus 'talking heads' in intimate relationships

We are all emotional as well as intellectual beings. Our brains are superbly designed to read and respond rapidly and accurately to emotions - we rely on this for our survival, as well as for connectedness and security. According to neuropsychiatrist Daniel Siegal, when we are emotionally flooded - that is, we have a strong emotional reaction to someone or something - a disconnect takes place between the emotional part of our brain and the part that controls reasoning, planning, reflecting and so on.

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